Friday, March 12, 2010

It goes both ways!

me and grandpa
There was one lesson I learned as a child that my mother had absolutely no problem teaching us and that was not to make fun of other people. Three of my grandparents suffered from a physical handicap. Both grandpa's walked with a limp and my precious paternal grandma lost a leg because of a serious car accident. Incidentally, the two children she lost in that accident were much harder to loose than the leg. Being so close to the three of them made us well aware of how it hurt to be made fun of. We would have been horrified if a stranger said something unkind about our grandparents so we never said unkind things about strangers either. In fact, the way a person looks on the outside became of little significance to me. I didn't choose my friends according to their size or shape. I had tall friends, short friends, heavy and light. I was always taught that it's what's inside a person that matters. While my husband was attractive, it's certainly not what attracted me or why I married him. I feel very blessed to have learned to see people's hearts. Unfortunately, I haven't always received the same treatment. I'm what many in the world would consider an attractive person. I remember my sophomore year of high school when a senior girl spit a huge wad of gum in the back of my hair because she had seen her boyfriend talking to me. I was 5'2", about 100 lbs. and a cheerleader with thick curly hair almost to my waist. I often wonder if it would have bothered her to have her boyfriend talk to a girl 200lbs with a face full of acne. Why is it so acceptable for a thin, attractive woman (by the worlds standards) to be hated for the way she looks, but not other types of people? Can't we all just get along? I thought these types of incidents were history along with my teen years, I mean the firm little cheerleader is long gone, but it surfaced again last weekend. I went to a wonderful women's convention with the ladies from my church. I was introduced to some other women from other churches and upon meeting one lady, she looked at me and said "oh, I hate you". I just stood there dumbfounded. She wouldn't even shake my hand! She said, "you're too skinny, you stay away from me." What the? Why do we do this to each other? I cannot help having the body that God gave me to inhabit any more than she can. And what's more, she'd probably like me if she'd get to know me. After all, we already have a lot in common. We're at a Christian women's conference. Some might say, "well, boo hoo. you poor little pretty person." Like this is the small price you pay for being worldly attractive. But, seriously, it's not fun to have people say they hate you for no other reason than the way you make them feel about themselves. I would much rather have my daughters grow up to be beautiful on the inside than drop dead gorgeous on the outside. That's what really matters, right? Ironically, that woman would probably never tell a handicapped person she hated them for it. Does she ever go up to someone and say "oh, I hate you, you've got red hair." So, that 's my rant for the day. Just remember that even though someone may be what you think is attractive, they may really want to be known for what's on the inside.

1 comment:

  1. Chas, I didn't want to say anything last night b/c of a reason I'll have to tell you privately, but I do agree that what that person said was out of line. You are a beautiful woman inside and out. And, while I admire your beauty, I certainly would never hate you for it, and it's so wrong for women to be seemingly unable to appreciate another woman's beauty and to avoid being envious. This is a wonderful blog post. Thanks for reminding us to be more kind-spirited :-) Love ya, Amy